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(Matthew 5:28)
Don't lust after women. (What about men?)
(Matthew 5:29-30) Cut off any part of
your body that causes you to sin.
(Matthew 5:42) Give to anyone who wants
something you have.
(Matthew 7:7-8) You will get whatever
you ask for. (I want a Mercedes.)
(Matthew 10:2-12) Never get a divorce.
(Lawyers would starve.)
(Matthew 5:38-44) Don't defend yourself,
just turn the other cheek.
(Matthew 5:28) If someone sues you, give
him more than he asks for.
(Matthew 6:25-34) Don't plan anything
in advance. God will give you whatever you need.
(Matthew 19:12) It's easier to go to
Heaven if you castrate yourself. (Ouch!)
(Matthew 10:29) God will reward you for
abandoning your family. (That solves the divorce problem.)
(Luke 12:33) Sell everything you own
and give the money away.
(Luke 14:26) You can be a disciple unless
you hate your family and yourself.
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HERE ARE SOME THAT PAUL ADDED:
(Romans 1:26-27)
Anyone who commits an unnatural sexual act deserves to die. (Most
sexual acts seem natural to me.)
(Romans 13:1-4) Obey all government laws.
(That would include Nazi Germany.)
(I Corinthians 3:18) Be a fool for Christ
to be wise.
(I Corinthians 3:18) Men and women should
never marry unless they can't control themselves.
(I Corinthians 11:3-10) Women should
always keep their head covered when praying of prophesying.
(I Corinthians 11:14) Men should not
have long hair. (What about all those pictures of Jesus in long hair.
Or is he an exception?)
(I Corinthians 13:34-35) Women should
be silent in church.
(I Thessalonians 2:9) Women should not
braid their hair, or wear gold or pearls or cosily attire.
(I Thessalonians 2:11-12) Women are to
learn in silence from men and to be submissive to them.
(I Thessalonians 2:12) Women are not
permitted to teach or to have any authority over men. (There goes
our school system.)
(James 4:7-10) God will exalt you if
you are humble, miserable, grieve and cry. Laughter should be turned into
sorrow. (Wow! What a killjoy.)
(II John 1:9-11) Never let a non-Christian
into your house.
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